Bike lane? Yeah right!

So, as you all know, there are these things called bike lanes and sidewalks. People generally walk on sidewalks and bike in bike lanes, right? Well, not in Alaska. So I decide to go for a little ride (1mi) to get some dinner and started out on the right side of the road as I would back home. I get no more than 100 yards down the street and someone yells, "Get on the sidewalk!" I looked directly at them with a confused look as they drove by. "Sidewalk? Bike on the sidewalk? The road is plenty wide for me to bike on." So I proceeded well to the right of the road in what I would term "the bike lane". No more than 30 seconds later someone else yells, "Get the *uck out of the road! USE THE SIDEWALK!" Displaying his manhood, he pressed on the accelerator in his ridiculously high truck as hard as he could, letting out a plume of smoke right in front of me. Dude, seriously? It's times like these when I wish I was an undercover cop. How cool would it be if he ended up having to stop at a red light and I strolled up to him, flashed my badge and said, "We don't tolerate pricks in the State of Alaska. License and registration please."